3: The number of the briefcase that always contains the million dollars in Destination Software’s Deal Or No Deal videogame for the Nintendo DS.

The song Friends in Low Places is really fucking hard.

Just saying.

Let me say something right up front: I do not know – or even pretend to know – whether or not Hillary Clinton is a racist. However, if I had to bet money on it, I would probably say that the answer is “no”. There is no evidence in any way, shape, or form that she is anything approaching a racist, and lots of circumstantial and anecdotal evidence to the contrary.

However, as I watch the U.S. presidential nomination process, it has become increasingly obvious to me that – while Hillary may not be a racist on her own – she is more than willing to pander to the racist brigade when dealing with Barack Obama. For a long time I wondered if that was just me, spinning innocent events into something sinister just because I find the woman so distasteful and appallingly hypocritical … but I am both relieved and disheartened to find that I am not alone.

The sad truth appears to be that Hillary will do anything to get elected, and if that means stirring up a virtual race war and then standing back and looking oh-so-obviously-white, so be it. She has already shown that she has nothing in the way of fortitude or personal conviction … now it looks like such nebulous and outdated ideas like “morals” are also firmly on her back burner.

Best Buy had this listed very briefly on their Canadian web site:

“Interactive and synchronized light and smoke stage show for Rock Band on the Xbox 360″

The listing has now been taken down, and the only other reference I can find to it is on a GameStop page (sans picture) here, but if this is the real deal then life just got a whole lot cooler. The release date on the GameStop page – June 28, 2008 – matches the date that was on the Best Buy page, so hope certainly springs eternal.

Please please please let this be true …

2,500,000: The number of additional downloadable songs purchased by Rock Band owners in the first seven weeks of the game’s release.

The long-awaited and much-lusted-after english-language release of Professor Layton & The Curious Village is finally almost here, and you can almost taste the puzzle goodness. Not to mention to insanely awesome art direction.

I have personally been waiting for this thing for two fucking years now, and the last few days are going to be hell. Just to make us squirm a little more, Nintendo has put up a “teaser’ web site which is more akin to “torture”. Come on, February 10th! Jeezus!

The long-awaited and much-lusted-after english-language release of Professor Layton & The Curious Village is finally almost here, and you can almost taste the puzzle goodness. Not to mention to insanely awesome art direction.

I have personally been waiting for this thing for two fucking years now, and the last few days are going to be hell. Just to make us squirm a little more, Nintendo has put up a “teaser’ web site which is more akin to “torture”. Come on, February 10th! Jeezus!

In the past I have taken space in These Very Pages to pimp Adobe’s Kuler portal/website/tool/community/whatever – the place where webheads, designers, art freaks, and anyone else with an eye for layout can create and share colour schemes. Now, through the magic of Cocoa Kuler you can have this goldmine of goodness right inside your Mac. Download the plug-in and any application that uses the OSX colour picker – everything from the Finder to InDesign to Photoshop to Keynote – can now access some seriously awesome content. You will be putting together wicked-ass pages and presentations faster than you can say “Wow, PowerPoint presentations look even more ghetto now.”

Oh, and it’s free. You’re welcome.

UPDATE: A day after I posted this they changed the name to Mondrianum. I get the point, this wasn’t just a plug-in for Cocoa-based apps, but come on. Mondrianum? That’s pretty awful.

If you use Firefox 2 for your workaday browsing you have been probably getting polite-yet-vaguely-insistent messages from the mothership to upgrade to a Firefox 3 beta. And, if you are like virtually every single person I know you have been resisting – mostly because you don’t want to fuck up your beloved cadre of extensions. Usually a wholesale upgrade in the FF world means a big pile of broken extensions until everyone manages to get their ducks in a row.

I feel your pain.

Luckily, I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency. Er, wait. I mean, luckily, there is this handy chart that tracks FF3 compatible extensions. It’s not the most lucid thing in the world, but it seems to be both up-to-date and accurate. Enjoy.

The dust has settled, the blood is shed, and another Macworld keynote is in the books. Right off the bat I have to admit that I was totally floored that there was actually a product called the “Air” … while I got the product right, I absolutely botched the name prediction. This was partly because the name “Air” is really stupid, and partly because Nike (whose number one product line is called “Air”) is a major partner of Apple’s and I was pretty sure that they didn’t want to step on any toes there.

Huh.

So yeah, I fucked up on the name, 100%. But if that is the worst I do in one of these things (and for the most part, it was) then I am still feeling pretty good. With that said, let’s see how the rest of the “fearless predictions” panned out”:

A Mac “tablet” computer/thingie:

My Prediction: “Not a chance. No way, no how.”

What Steve Said: Nada. Zero. As stated, the “tablet” computer in the Apple line-up is now the iPhone / iPod Touch family. The Jobsinator referred to this direction a number of times in the keynote, and as time goes on this will become the number one mobile computing form factor. Laptops will become desktop machines, and touchscreen palmtops will become the road warrior’s weapon of choice. Remember where you read that.

My Score: 10/10, baby.

Penryn-based MacBook Pro:

My Prediction: “For sure.”

What Steve Said: Er, nothing. WTF? The machines are almost ready to go, so why they didn’t see the light of day here is a bit of a mystery. I am guessing that this got turfed at the last minute, caught up in some sort of legal wrangle, or just put off until WWDC where there is more of a geek audience for it. Whatever the cause, this is sad, because these things are going to be swank.

My Score: 0/10. Damn.

A sub-notebook MacBook Pro:

My Prediction: “Almost a given … optical drive gone … wireless backup/expansion strategy.”

What Steve Said: “It fits in a manilla envelope!”

My Score: If I could give myself more than 10/10 I would. Nailed this one, right down to the needlessly exact details of the optical drive. Thank you, thank you very much.

Penryn-based iMac:

My Prediction: “A small chance – call it 30% … Low to non-existent.”

What Steve Said: SFA.

My Score: 7/10, since I gave it a 30 percent chance of showing up. Unlike the weather forecasters who take full credit either way when they say
“30% chance of rain”, I am big enough to admit that makes me 30% wrong. Fucking weather weasels.

Some sort of wireless Time Machine device:

My Prediction: “Very high – at least 80% … Your file will backup through the fucking air, baby.”

What Steve Said: “It’s Time Capsule!”

My Score: 9/10. I can only give myself 10 so many times, but really, I totally nailed this one too.

AppleTV overhaul:

What I Said: “100% for sure. Guaranteed. Look for … the ability to browse the iTunes store, and buy and rent movies from your couch even if you don’t have a traditional computer.”

What Steve Said: “AppleTV! Rent movies! Don’t even need a computer!”

My Score: 10/10. Really, it’s scary how smart I am.

A change to real high-speed iPhone networking:

My Prediction: “Another “for-sure” here.”

What Steve Said: Crap.

My Score: 0/10. Nada. Zip. Can’t anyone besides me see how fucking bad EDGE is?

iPhone SDK:

My Prediction: “Probably not … a passing update.”

What Steve Said: A passing update.

My Score: 10/10, again, thank you, and good night.

2: The number of times in the history of the NHL that two different players aged 40 or over have scored goals in the same game.

Note to brain-dead print media types: It’s “Macworld”, not “MacWorld”. At least read the fucking press releases, okay?

So here we are again, less than 24 hours away from the Macworld keynote, and tradition dictates … nay, demands that I make the usual slate of predictions. What makes this year a lot more interesting is the leakage of the “Something is in the air” motto from the Moscone Centre on the weekend – the “air” word is on everyone’s lips, and making otherwise rational people stupid. In recognition of this, I will give each of my predictions an “air” rating, to tie them into the all-consuming theme.

Let’s get one thing straight right now – the “air” tomorrow will be all about wireless networking / connectivity / backups / other moving of data without wires. Period. And with that in mind, here are the items that may or may not be dragged into the light tomorrow:

A Mac “tablet” computer/thingie: Not a chance. No way, no how. This will disappoint a lot of people – they have been slavering for two days now about the so-called “Apple Air” or “Mac Air”, thinking that this will be the name of this long-rumoured device. Yeah, well, dont hold your breath. While it is absolutely certain that Apple is working on something like this, the prevailing wisdom now is that they already have a super-small tablet computer in the iPhone / iPod Touch, so why bother. Air Factor: Zero – this is nothing but hot air. Heh.

Penryn-based MacBook Pro: For sure. The “Pro” end of the MacBook like is due for an overhaul, and the Penryn was pretty much designed to Apple’s portable specs. If we don’t see this tomorrow, something will have gone wrong at the last moment. Air Factor: Steve Jobs is really bugged by the fact that his iPhone has transparent and pervasive networking – WiFi at home or the office, and a seamless switch to (ugh) Edge networking when he is out and about. He wants the same kind of idea built-in to Mac portables. Universal and pervasive networking could be the star of the whole show.

A sub-notebook MacBook Pro: Almost a given. Many high-end graphics and photo professionals have lamented the demise of the 12″ high-end Powerbook – the Penryn’s power profile would allow the MacBook Pro to spawn a 12″ version, perhaps with the optical drive gone and some sort of dockable memory expansion. Air Factor: If it doesn’t have an optical drive, there will need to be some sort of wireless backup / expansion strategy.

Penryn-based iMac: A small chance – call it 30%. The shiny new iMac is still, well, shiny and new. It doesn’t need this tweaking yet, but it will definitely come, probably at next year’s show. Air Factor: Low to non-existent. They might try to tie in the next “air” piece to the iMac, but I doubt it.

Some sort of wireless Time Machine device: Very high – at least 80%. Time Machine is awesome, but only the first step. Apple wants to tie a household/office-wide backup and sharing strategy into the thought processes of every Mac user. Part of that strategy would be the idea that your backup device is always available, and that you don’t have to plug into it. Whether it is local wireless or a local network device with a wireless connection or a full WAN-addressable item with wireless piggybacking, I’m not sure. But it will definitely be there. Air Factor: Way high. Your file will backup through the fucking air, baby.

AppleTV overhaul: 100% for sure. Guaranteed. The AppleTV is a work in progress, and part of a very long-term strategy for the company. Look for ATV 2.0 to be more of a standalone device, with the ability to browse the iTunes store, and buy and rent movies from your couch even if you don’t have a traditional computer. There might be another surprise vis a vis remote TV watching, a la Slingbox. Air Factor: Bingo. You will sit on the couch and get your movies through the air, get it?

A change to real high-speed iPhone networking: Another “for-sure” here. Everyone (well, everyone except the morons who work for Rogers) knows that the Edg” network sucks major ass. Look for the official announcement that the iPhone will support either 3G/4G or WiMax. Actually, forget WiMax, since that is a Motorola product and after they fucked up the ROKR, Steve Jobs hates Motorola. Air Factor: What, I have to explain this one to you?

iPhone SDK: Sadly, this is a probably not. Software development kits have no media cachet. The only way we hear about this is in either a passing update, or if a huge player signs on as an iPhone software developer. Look for it at a separate “geek-only” event next month. Air Factor: None, which is another clue that we won’t see it.

There you go. Come back tomorrow after the keynote and we will see how I did. And as always, your mileage may vary!

So I’m now told that some people see Tootle as a covert attack on individualism and an attempt to stifle free thought in little children.

I’m shocked. SHOCKED.

77: The percentage of the world’s fresh water that is locked in the Antarctic ice cap.

Just in time for Macworld, a couple of new “Get A Mac” commercials have hit the airwaves. Referee is kind of weak – although the “realization” by PC that he lives on a featureless white plain is pretty good – but Time Machine is wonderful. I have been hoping that they would start to move away from the recent “attack Vista” ads and get back to “Mac is awesome, period” ads. I mean, it’s not even sporting at the point …

The platinum standard of news readers for the Mac has long been NetNewsWire. It has every feature you could want – the only thing that kept it from crushing every other product in this category was the fact that it carried a price tag. Money talks, and the average user would rather go with a substandard product with the magic “free” cost point. Brent Simmons realized this and also offered a “light” version of the product for free, but the “stigma” of a for-pay product hung to the name like a bad stench. Too bad, because the light version was still pretty good.

Rather than fight this any longer, Brent decided to get wise and offer the real product for free. You might as well grab a copy right now, because it blows the doors off of every other product, period. And, in case you missed it, it’s free.

I have already mentioned that my second favourite book when i was a very tiny child was Tootle, an awesome tale about a little steam engine who has a bit of a hard time learning that he should probably stay on the train tracks.

However, for those that took the time to ask, my absolute most favourite book in my pre-kinergarten years was something called The Story of Horace (for years I laboured under the mistaken belief that this was called Horace the Bear) which featured a lumberjack who had a pet bear named Horace. The lumberjack was always confused when he came home from work at the end of each day and found one less member of his family in the house. Apparently I used to clap and cheer as Horace would eat each person, starting with grandma and working down to the youngest kid. I would lobe to have a copy of this for nostalgia’s sake – maybe to frame – but sadly, there is now no way to get a copy of this book without spending serious coin – it is long out of print by the time I was born, and was fairly rare to begin with.

Damn.

2: The number of U.S. states that have never recorded a high temperature of 100 degrees F or more.

So the events team has descended on the Moscone Centre and is feverishly working to dress the place for next week’s Macworld conference. The first banners are going up even as we speak. Er, type. Anyway, the secret-up-until-now theme of this year’s show is “There’s Something In The Air” – a phrase that will set off rampant amounts of mostly-wrong speculation about What It Could All Mean between now and Tuesday morning’s keynote.

This snap courtesy of my pal John-John, who has already arrived in San Francisco and will be schmoozing around at the conference instead of me:

He was also a big enough prick to email me this picture from Beard Papa, where he was eating not one, not two, but three vanilla cream puffs.

Fuck you, John-John.

I am more than a bit smitten with this font. Stylistically, I adore pretty much everything from this era, and this font has some serious potential for display work. Also, it is wickedly well-though-out, with different kerning and pairing options built-in. Check it out.

As an aside, this guy looks to have some serious talent. Usually you look at a font designer’s portfolio and you see one “good” font, a couple of “maybe okay” ones and a bunch of “crap”. But – while I could do without the Marker/Felt junk – the catalog here has a lot of “good” and least three fonts that count as “fucking great” (Mostra, Kinescope, and Refrigerator).

Also, Goldenbook reminds me of Tootle (my second favourite book from when I was a tiny kid) so that’s kind of fun too.

125,000: The number of renters who were evicted in the United States in 2007 because the property owners defaulted on their mortgage, despite the renters paying their rent fully and on time.

Andrew Olmsted was a U.S. Army major serving in Iraq.

There are lots of servicepeople who blog from duty zones in Iraq and Afghanistan. And there are lots of servicepeople who are aware and accepting of the fact that they could die in the line of duty at any time. Major Olmsted had the presence of mind to combine those two realities.

He’s gone, but his words aren’t. A must read.

UPDATE: The major was also pretty skilled at predicting the future, or at least the circumstances of his death.

I have repeated the phrase “You would have to be a moron to trust any mission-critical system to Windows” so many times – and for so long – that it is essentially a mantra at this point. You would think that there would be no actual need to ever say this, since it is such a self-evident piece of truth … but the sad fact of the matter is that there are always going to be idiots out there who don’t understand this.

The irony of Seattle’s fireworks display being fucked up by Microsoft is, of course, too delicious for words. It’s like a warm fuzzy blanket of schadenfreude. Mmmmmm.